An honest look at "Self-Help" Books


I have a particular take on self help books. Many people disagree with my stance and that is why bookstores are loaded with self help guides. Because they sell. We figure if we buy a book on "how to" we will find miraculous answers. Truth be told, we are actually just reading another persons take on the issue. See what it really boils down to is - perspective. Granted the authors often have education and experiences that help them conceive these written works. Yet, I get so frustrated when people refer to the books as though they are the "only way, that is "what the book says to do." Sure, ok. You see I have a pretty cynical stance. It all started last year when I really examined the issue of perspective in great detail. The process helped me to realize that it is good to read, explore alternative points of view but to understand that in context they (the authors) are just human, offering another view and perhaps a fresh look. Therefore, I now view self-help as an exploratory process that can shed some light on a different method to the many common scenarios of life. Some of the points are good and others are only what worked for that specific author, nothing more.

Why tell you all of this? Recently, I received Love & War (Finding the marriage you've dreamed of) from Waterbrook Press, written by: John and Stasi Eldredge. Yes, it is a marriage "self-help." I needed to share with you why I believe that books are a good way to see things in a new light but they don't end all, nor fix all. This particular book takes several common marriage circumstances and explores them well. It offers a good look at how and why we error in our relationships. Then in review it provides another angle to the situation that might help you. If you can, read it for the new perspective that it can bring you. Yet, realize that it is not your life, it will not fix all, and it can't solve each problem. Along the way you will have to search for those answers within yourself, but John and Stasi may be able to offer you tools on where to look and how to get started.

This book was provided for review from Waterbrook Press.

Comments

Vanessa said…
ugh! I tried to read a book they authored and I couldn't even finish it! Have you ever come across an author that REALLY gets under your skin? For me, it was THEM!
Sarah Bergman said…
I totally agree with your position on self-help books. I HATE the book Baby Wise. Was the least helpful thing I could possibly read about how to care for a baby. Yet, a number of people have told me that it really helped them a lot and they were so glad they followed the book's advice. I think we just have to remember that even if an author has an authoritarian tone in their writing, it is still just their opinion. It's good to have an open mind.

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